The Courage to Embrace Change
This month's reflection begins with a story from my own life - four years abroad, a return to medicine, and a role that turned out to be a perfect fit for the physician I had been, not the one I had become. It's a piece for any physician who has stepped away for an extended time and found that getting back to work was the easier part. The harder question is: who has come back?
In 2009, my wife, our two children, and I returned to the United States after spending four years living and serving as missioners in Bolivia.
Our children were nine and seven years old. They had spent much of their childhood immersed in another culture and were about to enter an American public school for the first time. My wife was understandably focused on helping them navigate that transition.
I had a different concern.
I was worried about getting back to work.
Like many physicians returning after an extended leave, I felt pressure to hit the ground running. I needed to provide for my family. I wanted to regain my clinical confidence. I wanted life to get back to normal.
What I didn't realize was that normal no longer existed.
Those four years had changed me.
Living and working in Bolivia had been deeply meaningful. It reshaped how I viewed medicine, success, relationships, purpose, and even myself. But instead of making space to reflect on those changes, I packed them away and focused on restarting my career as quickly as possible.
I accepted a position that would have been a wonderful fit for the physician I had been before Bolivia.
It was not the right fit for the physician—and the person—I had become.
Over time, the disconnect caught up with me. I experienced increasing anxiety and depression, eventually leaving that position altogether. Looking back, I don't believe the problem was simply the job itself. The problem was that I had never truly integrated my experience. I hadn't slowed down long enough to ask how those four years had changed me or what they were inviting me to do next.
With the help of both a therapist and a coach, I began that work.
That process ultimately led me to a new calling—coaching physicians who are navigating burnout, career transitions, and the search for work that is more aligned with who they truly are.
Since then, I've met countless physicians who have stepped away from medicine for many different reasons. Some have taken parental leave. Others have cared for aging parents, recovered from illness, pursued research or mission work, traveled the world, or simply needed time to recover from burnout.
Many assume their greatest challenge will be getting back into practice.
In reality, the greater challenge is recognizing they are not the same person who left.
An extended break has a way of changing us. It can clarify our values, expose what was no longer working, deepen our relationships, or remind us of parts of ourselves that had been buried beneath years of responsibility and achievement.
The temptation is to return exactly where we left off, hoping things will somehow feel different.
But perhaps the better question is this:
How have I changed, and what does that mean for how I want to live and work now?
Sometimes the answer is that we return to the very same job with renewed purpose and healthier boundaries.
Sometimes we discover that small but important changes are needed.
And sometimes we realize we are being called in an entirely new direction.
None of those answers is right or wrong.
What matters is giving ourselves permission to ask the question.
If you are preparing to return to medicine—or to any meaningful work—after an extended time away, I invite you to spend some time reflecting before jumping back into your old routine.
You might begin with these questions:
Why did I step away in the first place?
What did I discover about myself while I was away?
Which values became clearer during this season?
What parts of my previous life still fit me, and which no longer do?
Who can help me make this transition with wisdom rather than simply speed?
We rarely emerge from significant life experiences unchanged.
The goal isn't to get back to who we were.
It's to thoughtfully become who we've grown to be.
I was fortunate to have wise companions who helped me navigate that journey. Their guidance transformed what initially felt like failure into one of the most meaningful seasons of my life and ultimately shaped the work I do today.
If you're facing a return after an extended leave, don't assume your only task is getting back to work.
Your deeper work may be discovering who is returning.
If that conversation would be helpful, I'd be honored to walk alongside you. Feel free to reach out for a complimentary consultation, and together we can explore how this season of your life might shape what comes next.
With compassion,
-Dr. Joe